Some statements are like bad cold and cough. Almost everyone gets it or gives it. One such is often heard during break-ups. And the gem is: “You’ll never find anyone like me again!” When someone said this to me once upon a time, I wondered, “My goodness! I should hope not! If I don’t want you, why would I want someone like you?”
Similarly, a close friend decided to move on a couple of years ago after her search for fulfilment in a romantic relationship hit a dead-end. She ignored his cough ’n’ cold and married a fine gentleman last year. She has turned out to be a terrific wife: she is a loving and caring woman who always forgives her husband when she’s wrong! They make a lovely couple and I’m happy for them.
A few months before getting married, Cynthia (That’s what I’ll call her) spoke to me about her ex-boyfriend. I’ll share it with you in brief. For her studies, Cynthia had gone to London for a few years. During her stay in the UK, she met Sid with whom she went steady for a few months. Things didn’t go well between them and as they went along, Cynthia realised Sid was not the right guy for her. Soon, they parted with mutual understanding and later she returned to India.
For a few months there was no news of him. Apparently, they had moved on and Cynthia was now committed to Samar with plans for future. But just when she thought everything was going fine, Sid resurfaced. He started making efforts to reconnect with Cynthia. She politely rejected his overtures. But he began badgering her with calls, emails and text messages. Cynthia was adamant, she refused to give way. Gradually, Sid became belligerent and stroppy. On a couple of occasions he even flew down to India to persuade her into making a comeback. His mindless doggedness and tenacity troubled Cynthia, but she had made up her mind to resist his foolhardiness. However, the uncertainty that surrounded the whole thing and Sid’s misdirected motives sometimes rattled her.
Cynthia discussed at length the entire story with me over chat and told me she was not sure what to do. “I am a little worried. I don’t know what Sid is going to do. We broke up because it wasn’t going anywhere. And now, he’s pestering me and persecuting me…”
Cynthia was right. “A relationship,” Woody Allen once said, “is like a shark. It has to constantly move forward or it dies. And I think what we (most of us) got on our hands is a dead shark.” Apparently, Cynthia wanted a sprightly and spry shark.
She instantly emailed me Sid’s handwriting on a greeting card he had presented to her in the UK. As I saw his handwriting unfold slowly on the screen of my laptop, the first word that zipped through my lips was: “FUCK”. I told her straight away that under no circumstances should she have anything to do with that man. He was sure a danger.
As I analysed Sid’s handwriting, I discovered that he suffered from the out-of-the-sight-out-of-the-mind syndrome. It meant that mentally he was with Cynthia as long as she was in front of him. But the moment she was physically absent, he would seek out “others” and hit on other women. I told Cynthia that this man had some serious conflict with women because of his awful relationship with his mother. Cynthia then revealed that indeed he was not at all on good terms with his mother and he hated her.
Now, click on Sid’s handwriting sample to enlarge it and look carefully at the sharp hooks in the lower zone letters y’s and g’s. The claw-like formation in the two letters are really ominous and if you see it in the handwriting of your lovers, please be careful. Such claws are often found in the handwriting of criminals. These hook-like formations are dangerous because they show up in that zone of the handwriting which reflects the writer’s relationship with his romantic partners, his professional health and his physical life. They are heart-breakers.
When I told Cynthia that this person can be physically abusive and violent, she said she had heard him talk about getting murderous if he did not get what he wanted. The muddiness in the strokes, caused by the irregular flow of ink because of an unstable pressure of writing, is indicative of his unsound mind. Such a writer can never think of his partner with respect and would rather look at her as an object of sexual gratification. During intercourse too, such writers can be violent with their partners.
About such hook formations, famous graphologist Andrea McNichol says: “The claw means… bitterness and bad instincts. He will seem to be the nicest person on the earth. No one would suspect this person of having an evil bone in his body. But then, he is setting you up only to stab you in the back; he will end up clawing you…. This is most frightening because you don’t know the knife is coming. The claw appears frequently in the lower zones of rapists. That does not mean that all people with such claws are rapists…”
My conclusion about Sid is based not only on the hooks appearing in the two letters. Using a magnifying glass, I have also spotted many things including muddiness, certain thickness of strokes and pointed endings of all the hooks. If I see such strokes in the handwriting of a woman on my first date, I’d get up to find the nearest exit. And you? Take your call.
In the space below, do write your views and share with me your opinion with the article and also your experiences with people like Sid, if at all you have had any. For any query write to me email@example.com or leave your message in the space below. For old articles, click here.
MEET A SWEET TANYA
This week, I’m analysing the handwriting sample of a Write Choice visitor from Canada, Ms Tanya Irvine, who sent me her handwriting via email. Tanya, you are perceived as a very sweet person who is controlled completely by emotion. Most of your decisions are taken by your heart. Anybody who comes to you with an emotional story moves you. After you are melted by such stories, some people do take advantage of you. And the matter is worsened because you are also a little gullible. It’s not difficult to presume upon your credulity.
If you like someone, you say it. You don’t like to withhold your emotions. If you love someone, your preferred way to express it would be a tight hug. (Though it’s not always possible!) Tanya, your need for people in your life is immense and you want to be accepted by everyone. Because of this desire to be liked and seek attention, you think that being sweet is the only way to make yourself acceptable to everyone. You want others to approve of you because you don’t trust your abilities to complete a task despite being an organised person. Your set your goals pretty high but the efforts you have been making or the risks you have been taking to achieve them are inadequate. You are essentially an outspoken person but you don’t speak your mind, fearing that by being blunt you might antagonise people. Also, you have fear of rejection and problem taking ‘no’ for an answer. Despite being a sweet person, you are facing issues in your intimate personal relationships.
Tanya, if anyone says anything unpleasant to you, it occupies your mind for a long time. You keep thinking about it and trouble yourself. You exhaust yourself thinking, “Why did he say that? What did he mean by that?” Right, Tanya?
Tanya, you have difficulty taking quick decisions and you need others’ help with forming an opinion. If others don’t approve of your decisions, it bothers you. You have a tendency to defy the authority. You hate people who boss around. I trace the root of this tendency your relationship with your father. You faced emotional issues with your dad.
In short, you are a great person and too friendly. You go all out to help your friends. And looking at your handwriting sample, I won’t think twice before accepting you as a friend. Honestly.
POP A PEN KILLER
Tanya, write “I do what I want to do” about three pages every day for a month on ruled paper . Leave a margin of one inch on the left. Write on every alternate line and make sure that the placement of your t’s are as you see in CORRECTION. The exercise will make sure the gap between your goals and your efforts is bridged. Also, you won’t unnecessarily feel the need for approval from others and will being to speak your mind more often than not. You’ll also cease to find fault with yourself. All the best, Tanya. Hope you enjoyed reading this.